This Parsha is about lashon Hora. Lashon Hora is so commonly discussed that it seems almost unwise to bring it up, but I will.
People who are not aware of Lashon Hora are always bowled over by the concept. The recognition that words cause harm, that we should stay away damaging statements even if they
are true, and the sense of control that we need to have is remarkable.
I personally think that Lashon Hora comes from a good place. We care about each other so we talk about each other. We are close enough to feel deeply betrayed by each other. We’re all connected. However, that very same character trait can be dangerous.
Tzoraas is like hives. When we do something that doesn’t agree with our physical makeup our body can react. A very spiritual person is also sensitive when it comes to his spiritual makeup. His or her body reacts as well. And there is a process. It is a process in which he has to come to terms with his or her condition. A Cohen needs to be called in. There is a tense waiting period to see if the blemish gets bigger. There is the lifestyle change and sometimes shame and seclusion. It’s a process.
A rebbe was once staying at an inn for a few days in the winter. One cold, stormy night when there were no other customers, there was a knock on the door. The innkeeper opened the door and found a downtrodden Jew. He said, “Please invite me in from the cold. Let me eat some food. But I must tell you that I have no money and I cannot pay.”
The innkeeper had nothing to lose. The food was cooking anyway. The beds were available. And in this weather he could expect no other customers. So he invited the man into the inn.
He showed the man to a room where he could get comfortable and invited the man to sit down and eat a hearty meal. When the man was done eating, he turned to the innkeeper and said, “Could you give me a small drink of schnapps?” The innkeeper thought for a moment and agreed. He headed to the back storeroom and from his special supply of schnapps he poured a small glass for the man. Suddenly, he began to eye the glass thoughtfully, and poured the drink to the floor and refilled the glass. Again, he eyed the precious drink and he spilled it out. The third time that he filled the cup he gave the man the drink that he had requested.
The rebbe watched the entire procedure with great fascination. The innkeeper explained. “To have a non-paying guest on a cold, winter night is disappointing. But I realized that I really have nothing to lose. The soup is cooking anyway; the beds are available. That part of the mitzvah I was able to do for this needy person. But when it came to the schnapps it was not so simple for me. After all, the schnapps will last until I can give it to someone who will pay its worth. As I poured him a glass I realized that I did so with resentment. And this is not the way a Jew must do a mitzvah.
“So I spilled it out and tried again. But this time, too, I realized that I was questioning why I should give the drink to someone who didn’t deserve it.
“So I spilled it out and tried again. This time I was able to pour the glass with generosity, hoping only good for my newfound guest. It was this glass that I was willing to serve him.”
When we care about our fellow man and woman, we need to think and rethink about everything we do for them and how we think about them. It isn’t easy to be perfect, but that’s what we’re aiming for.
Click on the link below for thoughts on the second Chapter of Pirkei Avos
Devarim Nechmadim on Avos – Chapter Two
Beautiful story and great hagdarah of loshon hara and hachnossas orchim Might steal that story sometime!